Road Trips....Chinese Style!

So, my love of road trips back home is not a secret.  I don't really like airplanes nor do I like the hassles involved in flying. Long lines, crowds, never enough space for your stuff....I also think driving from state to state or place to place is a great way to see more of the country. Our motto, which our kids loooove (ha), is that "getting there is part of the journey."  Some of our recent road trips include trips to Disneyworld, to Washington DC for Chris' interview, back to DC for training, to Colorado, to New Mexico and to the beaches of Alabama.  Early in the morning, we carried sleepy kids to the car, packed our gear up in our trusty minivan, grabed our coffee mugs and hit the road.  We've always loved to plan our routes so that we can stop and explore local sights along the way, such as Judge Roy Bean's courthouse/saloon or Cadillac Ranch. I really wanted to continue this road trip tradition in China or wherever else we might end up in the future. Summertime just calls for a good road trip.

Well, obviously some things have changed in the past year.  I've had to conquer my fear of flying.  We also have come to terms with the fact that for us to take off across China for long distances in our minivan might be a bit foolhardy given our lack of the Mandarin language. It is pretty frustrating to not be able to communicate your most basic needs to other people.  Although Chris and I are both working quite diligently on our Mandarin, it remains pretty slow going. That said, we have decided to make mini day trips in the surrounding area as much as possible.  It remains a great way to see more of China and to get insight into the daily lives of the folks here in China.  Plus, the city is surrounded by mountains and cultural relics like palaces and temples so there is plenty of stuff to see and do. I like the city itself, but everything is always super crowded.  We hope that by heading out of the city a bit we will find some more natural and less-crowded surroundings.

We decided to start with a trip to Black Dragon Pool, which is about 200 km from Beijing.  I managed to find some basic directions online, but they were of the "drive north until you get to the city of Miyun, then head northwest for 13 km" variety.  Our GPS system is a life-saver, but it doesn't work that well until you actually drive somewhere and mark it.  So, it isn't very useful if you haven't been somewhere before.  Oh, and Google maps tends to print the names of the roads using Chinese characters instead of Pinyun, which makes their maps completely useless to us. We finally decided to just head out and hope that there would be some signs along the way.  I wasn't sure how big of an attraction this was or how well-marked these things would be outside the city proper.

Anyways, we did get a tiny bit lost when we first got to Miyun, but then miraculously, we ended up on the correct road and found Black Dragon Pool.  It all worked very much like going to a US park.  An attendant waived us in to a giant parking lot, I fed the kids some sandwiches for their lunch and then we headed out for the hike.  The park itself had a pretty steep entrance fee by Chinese standards and was actually quite clean and not too crowded. It was all Chinese families.  We only saw 2 other Westerners there, but lucky for us, the signs were in English and Mandarin.  As a side note for any local families contemplating it, the bathrooms were the pretty standard squatties, but they were in reasonable condition for rural China. We hiked for 4 hours, then hopped in the car, hit "home" on the GPS and came right back.  There were lots of gas stations along the route so no worries there.

One random thing that we noticed was an explosion of little vacation cottages and motor courts and touristy "folk villages" in the mountains outside of Beijing.  Although some English was used in the signage, these were clearly not aimed at Western tourists.  Most Western tourists don't explore much outside the city beyond the Great Wall. I think the growth of automobiles in China and the increasing wealth of some people here is leading to more discretionary travel on weekends.  Some folks might even have weekend homes out there that they go to in order to get away from the hustle and bustle of the big city.  It is so interesting to see these changes taking place right before your eyes.

So, I have some other ideas of trips that we will try to take this summer to a few cities within 3-4 hours of Beijing.  I'll keep everyone posted on where we go and what we do.  Since most of the English language guidebooks are aimed at tourists, there just isn't a lot of information on road trips or driving directions to various places within China.  Chris and I have both read "Country Driving: A Chinese Road Trip" by Peter Hessler. I highly recommend this book if you want additional insight into China.  It isn't all road tripping. He does make an amazing journey along the entire length of the Great Wall, but it also covers industrialization and the changing face of China.  

Here they are lined up at the entrance to the park

The largest waterfall, which was supposed to "give you a fresh feeling that will last all day"

Before we headed out, we debated whether they had snakes here.  Nobody we talked to had ever seen one.  Then we heard this guy rustling around in the bushes behind us.  He was BIG, probably 1-2 feet long.  So, yes, there are snakes.

Part of an unrestored section of the Wall

Not sure what this sign means. No exploding cars.  Ah, the joys of random road signs.

We're Not Actually Rich People, We Just Hang Out With Them Sometimes....

On a recent playdate, Violet uttered a phrase that encapsulated one of an ex-pat mommy's worst fears.  When told that it was time for her and her friends to clean up her room, Vi responded with "Don't worry, ayi will do it."  She has only been here 5 months and she is clearly already growing accustomed to one of the big perks of life abroad -- household help.  We will definitely not always have help.  There are many places in the world where regular help is even more expensive than it is in the United States.  When we live back in the states, full-time help is definitely NOT an option on our extremely modest ONE-income government salary.  Although domestic employee wages are definitely on the rise in China, it is still fairly affordable to have full or part-time help here.  We have part-time help and my children are clearly growing accustomed to having somebody help with their laundry, tidy up and make their beds, etc.

This situation does highlight another challenge of raising kids abroad.  In many countries, like China, there is simply no middle class.  There are rich folks and poor folks. All of the trappings of a middle-class life, such as a house with indoor plumbing, a washer and dryer, televisions, DVD players, a safe car, etc. etc. put us firmly in the ranks of the wealthy here.  The house that we live in here would be a nice, normal middle class home back in America.  Yet living in a house like that here vaults us into the ranks of the wealthy in the eyes of the people living around us. Our kids go to English-speaking international schools abroad because when you move around every 2-3 years that is really the only way you will be able to get an education.  These schools also enable our children to have access to a curriculum and support services somewhat similar to those we found back in the United States. International schools are often populated by foreign nationals who really are quite wealthy.  Many of my kids' friends have drivers who drop off a hot lunch every day.  They are spending their summer break at their villas in Italy or Switzerland.  My kids get to hang out at our compound and swim and perhaps go on a trip to Guangzhou where Chris is going for business.  Their driver and cook?  Well, that would be me!  Oh, and they get a PBJ sandwich with some fruit and chips most days.

I'm honestly not too worried about my older two kids believing they are wealthy and entitled to household help. I feel that the many years they have spent in the states grubbing out our home on weekends have given them a good idea of our station in life. Violet will be our true "third culture kid" experiment since it is highly likely she will spend the next decade or so abroad.  I want to raise her to be humble and grateful and thankful for the many things that we really do take for granted.  Poverty in the United States does exist and it can be truly hard, but much of it is different from the poverty we will see overseas.  Here in Beijing, conditions seem much better than in parts of India or Africa where many people encounter starving children and people camped out in shantytowns on a daily basis. Plus, China's economy is growing with leaps and bounds, which means that there is a sense of upward mobility among the people here.  There are lots of new drivers with bright shiny cars and lots of flashy stores and malls appearing.

Now, in the interest of full disclosure, I do worry about the sense of entitlement--but not enough to do without our ayi.  I do have several friends who have recently given up household help and gone "ayi-free" so that their children will continue to gain experience doing basic household chores.  I'm not quite there yet.  I'm still uncomfortable that somebody else is doing the chores that I hate, but I'd be lying if I didn't admit that I also love it.  I can't tell you how fabulous it would have been to have an ayi when I had several very young kids and babies in the house.  It is pretty fabulous now, but would have made those early years a lot less challenging.  Right now, not having to spend a Saturday morning barking at my kids and micro-managing their cleaning efforts is worth a great deal.  I could certainly change this view at some point, but am enjoying the help quite a bit right now.

That said, we are going to launch the "great laundry experiment" this summer.  I plan to make the big children accountable for doing at least some of their laundry every week.  I've always sworn I will not raise boys who don't know how to do laundry or cook basic things.  Yet, that is exactly what I am raising. Now that I have a teen and a kiddo on the verge of teen-hood, it seems wise to begin to address these shortcomings. Perhaps I'll throw some weekly cooking lessons in there as well. I'm also paying more attention to ensuring Violet picks up her own room every evening BEFORE our ayi comes so there is no expectation of the magic cleaning fairy arriving and putting things back in their places.  I'm hoping that by setting some firm boundaries and emphasizing the values that are important to us, I can help our children emerge from this lifestyle without being thoroughly and completely spoiled rotten.

Wrapping Up The School Year

So I'm happy to report that all of the kids have passed this crazy school year involving 2 moves and 2 different schools. They will be 1st grade, 6th grade and 9th grade next year. This day seemed a long way off when we arrived in Falls Church last September and sent them to school the next day. Our community is saying goodbye to lots of friends who are moving on to new adventures. Violet seemed relieved that she will not be saying goodbye this year. I told her that she will be 8 when we move in, which seems very old to her.  She doesn't yet realize how quickly time flies.

 I thought I'd share some random pictures and a rundown of our last week. Chris played a gig at a bar called Nashville with The Crazy Bads, an embassy rock band. Ethan visited Love and Hope, a school for the children of migrant workers. He and his classmates supported the school in their make an impact project and were able to donate almost $200 to the school by serving as busboys in the cafeteria and hosting a Nerf Gun event at school. The entire project was kid driven and I only saw the finished presentation. Very cool!  Alex had to work hard the past few weeks to finish up projects, but also got to do some fun stuff as well including a trip to Pingyao. Violet had her kindergarten swim party and is ready for summer!  And our big excitement this week was the arrival of our car. Now I need to get to driving it. It is exciting how much that opens up our world. So many new places to explore!  My big activities have been exploring and shopping. Check out this neat basket and bowl from a local furniture factory. They make their pieces with salvaged wood. They have some gorgeous armoires and hutong doors that I'm coveting, but I stuck with the baskets today. I also biked to a local tile factory with friends and grabbed these nifty guys. They are traditionally used on rooftops here and have symbolic and important meanings. The company I bought them from also makes the roof tiles in the Forbidden City.

The Crazy Bads

Yes. Our minivan arriveth!

Ethan and his project partners

Violet playing alligator bridge at her party